Posts Tagged ‘love’

7 Steps to Happiness

January 19, 2014

I watched the Broncos football game today and observed the faces of the players from both teams. Although it seems like “just a game” to me I know that it isn’t to the players…or the fans. 

Thinking about happiness reminded me of an article from Psychology Today from 1989. Below are the “Seven Steps to Happiness”. Here’s hoping that you are having a great Sunday no matter who wins the football game!

1Invest yourself in closeness: Of all the circumstances happy people share, loving relationships seem the most characteristic and most important. So when you’re setting your priorities, time for your loved ones should be No. 1. (I love Greg Roman! He loves me, his bar, Rhino’s Sports and Spirits. and the Broncos!)

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2. Work hard at what you like: If love is most important to happiness, keeping busy at work you like may be second in importance. If your job doesn’t fit that description now (or look like it will in the near future), search hard for ways to find work that satisfies your very real need to do something that is meaningful to you. (I am so happy that I was able to write a book and learn so much at the same time! You can download the book from Amazon on January 24 and 25 and it will be FREE!)

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3. Be helpful: Altruism builds happiness in at least two ways. Doing good makes you feel good about yourself. In psychological terms it enhances self-esteem. And there’s evidence that altruism relieves both physical and mental stress–thus protecting the good health so important to most people’s happiness. (The picture below shows a rescued cat who was returned to her owner in the arms of an amazing Humane Society Customer Service Representative name Carolyn.)

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4. Make the pursuit of happiness a priority: All things may indeed come to he (or she) who waits, but why wait to feel good? Discover what makes you happy and make time to do it. (Hiking in Colorado with friends Linda Lewis and Mary Bartz!)

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5. Energize yourself: Run, play a sport, dance–the choice is yours, as long as you keep aerobically fit. Whether the feeling of well-being produced by exercise is due to the release of endorphins–the brains natural painkillers–or something else, researchers agree that fitness is one reliable road to happiness. 

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6. Organize, but stay loose: It’s good to know where you’re going and to make plans for fun along the way. But since novelty makes us happy, be ready to seize an unexpected opportunity to try something different.

7. Steady as she goes: We all have our nights and lows, but strive to a sense of perspective. Emotional intensity can be costly. Those who hit the highest highs tend to read the lowest lows as well.

What makes you happy?

 

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Old Photos and Potato Chips

September 30, 2013

My sister-in-law, Tracy, asked me to send her some photos of Joel, his brother Lee, and our sons, Adam and Seth.

Tracy asked me if it made me sad to look through my old photos. I told her that looking at the pictures made me smile and appreciate what I had even though I miss Joel, Adam, and Seth with all of my heart. 

Of course looking at the photos takes my breath away because my boys were so cute! The first two pictures also reminded me of why I like potato chips so much…

Take a look for yourself — I think you will agree with me that my boys were cute and that potato chips are delicious and fun to eat.

*Seth is on the left and Adam is on the right in the first two pictures. In the black and white you will see Adam, Lee, Seth and Joel.

Enjoy.

 

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Just Say Something

September 20, 2013

I have saved an article from Newsweek, written by Betsy Okonski in 1996, titled “Just Say Something”. Betsy and her husband lost a baby in childbirth. What Okonski wrote was exactly how I thought in 1995 and still do to this day. Here is a quote from the article.

“One of the most helpful things you can do for a bereaved person is to acknowledge the loss. Don’t fear causing pain by bringing it up. It was much more upsetting to me when someone acted like nothing happened. Keep it simple. ‘I’m sorry’ may feel inadequate, but the truth is that there is really nothing you can say that will take the pain away. Sincerely said, ‘I’m sorry’ says that you care, and that’s what is truly needed.”

“Grief lasts a long time….if you have not acknowledged the loss yet, regardless of the reason, do it now. It is never too late.”

On Tuesday of next week it will be 18 years since the plane crash that took the lives of my husband and two sons, Joel, Adam, and Seth Herzog. Thank you to everyone who helps keep my memories alive each day. Thank you to everyone who has said, “I’m sorry” or “I have been thinking of you”. 

 

 

 

 

The Colorado Springs Youth Symphony and memories of my sons

February 14, 2013

Today I attended a fundraiser for the Colorado Springs Youth Symphony (CSYS) and the Children’s Chorale. In one hour we were able to eat breakfast and listen to beautiful music presented by both groups. Gary Nicholson, my best friend’s husband, started the symphony over 25 years ago and continues to conduct the top orchestra. It was wonderful to listen to the beautiful music. At our table sat someone I had not seen since my sons were in elementary school – the father of children who knew Adam and Seth. He gave me a hug and told me what his children were doing now. Our talk made me think about what Adam (who would now be 30) and Seth (who would now be 28) would be up to. Playing tennis? Small business owners? Teachers? Doctors? Lawyers? Married? Not married? Parents? 

It was nice thinking about them as grown ups even though it also makes me sad. I wish I could call them and wish them a “Happy Valentine’s Day.” I hope, wherever you are reading this, you are spending some time with someone special today. Greg, my fiancé and I are going to walk the dogs and wear red. 

 

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“Perhaps Love” by John Denver

January 27, 2013

I received a note from Kathy after she read “Radical Survivor.” She wrote:  I just finished “Radical Survivor.” I cried, laughed and couldn’t stop reading until I finished your book in one afternoon. Even though this tragedy happened 17 years ago, I feel as though I just experienced your loss through your story – you touched my heart. I’m enclosing the lyrics to John Denver’s “Perhaps Love,” a song I always think of when someone loses a loved one – “the memory of love will see you through.”  The memories of the love you felt for Joel, Adam, and Seth and the love they felt have you have carried you through. Bravo – a great book!

Thoughts about “Radical Survivor” from Eric

January 25, 2013

Your book, your story, your life, reminded me not only to treasure every moment, but also to reach out to those who are important to me and let them know, over and over again, as needed, how special their role is in my life and heart.